Power Freak–Why I NEED Power!

I’m going to be perfectly honest with you..the reason I NEED the Power of the Holy Spirit is because I am a wimp! 

I am happy to admit this!  I spent so many years trying to pick myself up by the boot straps and keep a stiff upper lip,  that it took me many years to even learn what being weak and resting on the Lord and His Holy Spirit Power even really meant.  You see I really thought that I had to work hard to put that smile on my face when I felt like screaming and crying. 

As life’s trials would crash in on me,  I simply didn’t really know how to say “HELP LORD!”  Growing up in such dis function “help” would never come.  God has a way of humbling us though.  He is a good Father that knows what is best for His children.  I really thought that I was living for God,  I was sure it was up to me to build this good reputation for God.  However what I found out from deep heartache was that God wanted me to rest in Him.

During a time of great sorrow in my life I learned to lean on the Lord and turn my face to Him.  It was Dec. of 2000,  after a long bout with AIDS my little sister died.  We were very close and it so broke my heart.  Two weeks later my daughter was born, and six weeks after that my Stepson was in a critical accident with brain damage.

You see,  this time I had no energy left to pick myself up,  to smile,  to build a good reputation for God.  As a matter of fact I wondered why in the world God would even allow so much to happen..didn’t He know that I couldn’t take anymore?  I was humbled before my Creator…would I believe all of the promises in His Word?  Would I turn my face to Him or would I choose to turn away?  Would I choose to be better or bitter?  Let me tell you,  I had no strength to walk through this mess. 

I began to seek God like I had never before!  I did not want to be bitter,  I did not want to turn my back on God!  So I asked Him to hold on to me!  The more I sought after God the more He revealed Himself to me.  I started to come alive again,  only this time I truly knew what it was to be weak and to rest in God’s strength.  To allow His Holy Spirit to change me and transform me even more than before.  To be able to cry out to God and trust His promises to be there even when I can’t feel it!

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,  who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28

Even when I didn’t see how God could work anything good out of these things, I still chose to believe.

“No,  in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.  For I am convinced that neither death nor life,  neither angels nor demons,  neither the present nor the future,  nor any powers,  neither height nor depth,  nor anything else in all creation,  will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”  Romans 8:37-39

Bold letters mine

Tell me are you convinced that God loves you that much?  I hope so!

Since that time in my life I have been able to surrender more and more things to Him..the simplest of things.  He is a good Father and when I rely on His Holy Spirit to guide me and I know that I am in His will..well there is no better place to be than weak.

God does not promise a problem free life,  but he does promise to be with us.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.  In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart!  I have overcome the world.”

Seek God my friend with all your heart,  soul and mind and He will give you everything you need by the Power of His Holy Spirit!

Just one more day… are you sticking with me?  Tomorrow..How God is Glorified through us! 

Oh by the way my…God totally healed my Stepson..he has a brilliant mind and is a financial advisor for a very prestigious firm!  It baffled the many Dr’s he had…of course..that’s what God does!!